


Soulmates

by xXAnaloceitXx



Category: Sanders Sides
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Autistic Logic | Logan Sanders, Deceit also has DID, Deceit is called different names, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:29:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23809174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xXAnaloceitXx/pseuds/xXAnaloceitXx
Summary: AU where your soulmates first words that they say to you after your eighteenth birthday show up on your wrist.!MORE OR LESS ABANDONED. I LOST THE CONFIDENCE TO BE ABLE TO DO THIS JUSTICE. I DO HAVE IDEAS MY ANXIETY IS JUST A BITCH!
Relationships: DLAMP
Comments: 8
Kudos: 86





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Alright time for some disclaimers! I DO NOT HAVE AUTISM OR DID! If I get something wrong please politely correct me. Also I know this first chapter is short, I'm hoping to make future ones longer.

Dex looked at their phone, counting down the minutes until their eighteenth birthday. On your eighteenth birthday your soulmate’s first words to you would appear on your wrist. They had five minutes before their eighteenth birthday. They continued to just listen to music and count down the minutes. Their mom and dad had come in when there was a minute left and they all waited. At midnight they looked at their wrist which was covered by their jacket sleeve. 

“Well?”

They took a breath and moved the sleeve. There were four quotes on their wrist and they knew there was a confused look on their face. 

“I have four”

They showed their parents their arm. They also looked confused. It was unusual to have more than two soulmates, so four was odd. 

“Well, that’s ok. Just means you have more people to love you!”

Dex nodded and chewed on their thumb nail. Sure it could mean that, but what if they didn’t like them? They weren’t exactly normal. They had so many things wrong with them. Depression, anxiety, OCD, DID, and many other things. Not to mention that they were the only alter to go by they/them pronouns. They watched as their parents left and laid back on their bed. They wished they knew who they were, wished they could just talk to them. They knew that they might have already met them, these were just the first words they would say to them after their eighteenth birthday. They looked at their arm again and read the quotes again. 

_“Hey, breathe”_

_“Are you ok?”_

_“Hey, Dex! Want a cookie?”_

_“Do you need any help on the math homework?”_

They also looked at the colors that they were. One was a dark blue, one was a light blue, one was purple, and the last one was red. They sighed and stared up at the ceiling. They heard their phone go off and picked it up, seeing a text from Logan. Logan was the smartest kid in their class and was also a good friend to them. They weren’t close, but they were friends as far as Dex was concerned. 

From: Logan  
Do you need any help on the math homework?

Dex gasped and looked at their arm again. They looked back at the text and smiled. They sent a reply. 

From: Dee  
No, thank you for the offer though!

They got another text a few minutes later. 

From: Logan  
Dex, if it is not too personal… may I see your soulmate quotes?

Dex took a pic and sent it. They waited a few minutes and jumped when their phone went off. They looked and saw the picture of Logan’s arm. Their quote was written in a yellow-green color, their favorite color. 

From: Logan  
It would seem we are soulmates

From: Dee  
Yea, I also see that we have three more

From: Logan  
Yes it would seem that way

From: Dee  
Any idea on who they are?

From: Logan  
Considering I just got them yesterday and just found you, no

Dex nodded at the message and then typed a reply.

From: Dee  
Fair enough. See you at school tomorrow

From: Logan  
See you tomorrow

Dex laid their phone beside them and stared at the ceiling. They needed to sleep, they did have school in the morning. They sighed and rolled over, turning off their lamp. They then put on a YouTube video and fell asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

When Dolphus woke up he let out a groan and turned off the alarm. Of course he would be out when they had to be up early. He let out a sigh and got up, getting dressed and then grabbing their bag and heading down for breakfast. Their mom always made breakfast, mostly eggs which were ok. Not Dolphus' favorite but still good.

He ate in silence, still grumpy about being up this early. When he was done he said goodbye and left, walking to school. When he got there he sat at his normal table with his friends. Virgil was sleeping, his hood covering his face. Roman was talking about the upcoming play that he had been cast as the lead in. Logan was reading a book and Patton was listening intently to Roman.

Dolphus smiled and tuned into what Roman was saying. After a few minutes the bell rang and Patton shook Virgil, waking him up. They went their separate ways to their different classes, they would all meet up again at lunch. The day went as it normally did and then lunch came around. 

Dolphus got to the table with his food first. Then Logan showed up, nodding at him. Virgil sat without a tray and leaned back in his chair, his hood over his face. Dolphus assumed he would take a nap and left him to it. Roman sat down with his food next to Dolphus and Patton was the last one to join the table.

"Hey Dex! Do you want a cookie?"

Dolphus looked at him for a second, he had forgotten that no one but his family knew about their DID. 

"What kind, Patton?"

Patton's eyes widened and then he looked at his arm. Dolphus did the same and then his eyes widened. He looked back to Patton. 

"Are you ok?" Roman asked. 

He then looked at Roman and felt his breathing pick up. There was no way his best friends were also his soulmates. No, no fucking way. He heard Dex get on to him for the curse and told them to shut up. Virgil took his hood off and looked around the table. 

"Hey, breathe"

Dolpus gasped and looked at Virgil then. He knew it was true, the quotes were right there, but he didn’t want to believe it. There was so much they didn’t know and he wasn’t sure they were ready to know some of it. They all looked at his wrist and saw their quotes on his wrist, in their favorite colors. 

“Yes I’m ok, Roman. Also thank you, Virgil”

Their eyes widened when they looked at their own wrists. 

“We’re all soulmates” Virgil said in awe.

Dolphus nodded and then the bell rang. They went their separate ways, but met up again in their homeroom. They sat together and just stared at each other. 

“So, what do we do about this?”

Dolphus knew he was stressing out and it was gonna cause a switch. That’s the last thing he needed right now. He took a breath and let it out. 

“I mean we’re already friends, right? So I guess this means that we’re just meant to be more than friends?”

They all nodded at Patton’s questions. Dolphus let out a sigh and then looked at the time. They only had ten minutes left of class. 

“Do you all want to come over after school?”

They all nodded and then they all just sat there. The bell rang and they all walked to Dolphus’ house. He called out in the house saying he had friends over and they would be in his room. Dolphus collapsed on his bed, Patton and Virgil sat on the bed with him, Logan sat at his desk, and Roman sat on the floor. 

“So, should we start with learning new things? Like is there anything we don’t know about each other?”

Dolphus could feel the switch coming and knew he needed to say something before it did. He sighed and sat up. 

“Actually”

They all looked at him. 

“There’s something kind of important that you don’t know” 

He looked down at his hands which were fidgeting with his blanket. 

“I have DID”

He glanced up and saw the looks of shock and then looked back down. 

“I’m sorry for not telling you sooner”

“It’s ok, just why didn’t you?”

He shrugged, there wasn’t really a reason he just didn’t. 

“May we ask questions?”

He could feel himself start to dissociate and was having a hard time focusing on what they were saying. 

“Normally yes, not right now though. Sorry”

“It’s ok, are you alright?”

“Um, I’m kinda switching. Sorry”

“You never have to apologize for that. Is there anything we can do to help?”

He shook his head before putting his face in his hands. He didn’t feel like himself and he knew why. He took a breath and let it out, Dayna taking control. She was the best at explaining it and answering any questions. She also handled hate the best, so it made sense that she would front for this. She looked up and saw their four friends staring at them. She got a brief description of the previous conversation from Dolphus and let out a sigh. They all looked at each other and then back to Dayna. 

“I’m sure you have questions, you may ask them now”

They all looked at each other again, mouths open in shock, then they looked back at Dayna. 

“Would you like me to just explain and then you can ask any questions that haven’t been answered?”

They all nodded and she sighed. 

“Ok, well it is common knowledge that this disorder is rooted in trauma. Childhood trauma to be exact”

They all nodded. 

“Ok let me go through some do’s and don’t’s of DID”

They all gave her smiles and nodded. 

“You are allowed to ask who you’re talking to if you don’t know, which until you learn the differences between us you won’t know. You are allowed to ask questions to get to know us separately, some may answer certain questions and others won’t. There are six of us including Dex who is our host. You may not ask about the trauma, you are not in any danger because the media portrayal of DID is inaccurate in that sense, and I think that’s about it”

They all nodded and then looked at each other. Logan cleared his throat before looking at Dayna again. 

“You said we’re allowed to ask who we’re speaking to, so who are we speaking to currently?”

“My name is Dayna, my pronouns are she/her”

They all nodded and then they sat in silence. 

“We understand if you wish to end any relationship with us, we understand that this is a lot”

They all gave her a confused look. 

“We’re not going anywhere. We just need a few minutes to process. We still care about you, all of you”

She nodded and then looked down at her hands. They sat in silence for a few minutes before Logan cleared his throat again, causing Dayna to look up. He wasn’t making eye contact and was looking down at his hands.

“There’s something that I haven’t told you”

They all gave him nods hoping he would continue. 

“I have autism”

He wouldn’t look up and kept fidgeting with a ring on his finger. They all looked at each other and then back at Logan. It was a little obvious when you actually looked at Logan as a whole, but they still never would have guessed that he had autism. 

“Logan, that’s ok. We still care about you. We’re not going anywhere” 

Patton gave him a hug and he smiled.  
“So is there anything we need to know regarding that?” Roman asked. 

They all looked to Logan and he looked down for a second. He then looked up and gave them a nod. 

“I tend to get sensory overload very easily and it can cause meltdowns. I normally try to remove myself from the situation before the meltdown happens” 

They all nodded. He looked down again. Soon Dayna’s mother called them all down for dinner and they went downstairs. They ate in silence other than the occasional question about their day. Soon the others had to leave. They each gave Dayna a hug and then left. Dayna went to go to her room, but her parents stopped her. 

“Are they the ones?” her mother asked.

She nodded with a small smile. 

“Do they know?” her father asked. 

“Yea, I told them today. I think this will be good”

They smiled and then she went up to her room. She laid down and grabbed her phone off the bed side table. She saw that they had started a group chat with all of them and smiled. She sent a message saying she was going to bed after she saw the messages saying they all got home. She then put her phone on the charger and rolled over, closing her eyes and going to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

They all met at their table the next morning, doing the usual. Patton gently shook Virgil when he let out a snore. Virgil grumbled but didn’t say anything and went back to sleep. Devrah had to stifle a laugh at that. She jumped when the bell rang and chuckled a little at her reaction. She then went to her class. The first classes of the day went by as normal and then lunch came around. Virgil was already at the table when she sat down. Logan sat down next, followed by Roman and Patton. 

“Can you believe that we’re graduating in like a week?”

Virgil shot up and pulled his hood off. 

“What?!”

They all looked at him. 

“Yea? Next Friday is graduation”

Virgil’s eyes widened and he stared at them. They all gave him confused looks. 

“Virge?”

“I didn’t realize graduation was that close! I haven’t heard from any of the colleges I applied to!”

They could see his breathing pick up and saw the panic in his eyes. Patton reached over and grabbed his hand, tapping out the rhythm for the breathing exercise. Slowly, Virgil’s breathing returned to normal. 

“Virgil it’s ok. I haven’t heard from the colleges I applied to either” Roman said as he grabbed his free hand. 

Virgil gave him a small smile, before giving it to everyone else and having it returned. Devrah remembered that she hadn’t heard from any colleges either. She had applied to four and had been checking her email and the mailbox at home almost daily. 

The bell rang and they went their separate ways, meeting up in homeroom at the end of the day. They sat at their normal table together. Virgil had his phone out and was scrolling through Tumblr. Logan was reading a book, Roman was looking over his lines, Patton was looking at Pinterest on his phone. Devrah was reading fanfiction on her phone when she got an email. She checked the email and saw it was from her number one pick for college. She had been accepted. She gasped and they all looked at her. 

“I just got accepted to my first pick college”

“Congratulations” Logan said, pulling his phone out as he got a notification. 

The others got notifications at the same time. They had all applied to the same college and had all gotten in. The bell rang and they all stood up grabbing their bags. 

“Hey, um, my mom kinda wants to meet you all if you’re up for it?” Virgil said.

They all nodded, Devrah sending a quick text to her parents. They then walked to Virgil’s house, being greeted by his mom. 

“It’s wonderful to meet you all! I know you’ve been Virgil’s friends for a bit and I can’t believe you’ve never been over!”

They all gave her a smile and then they heard Virgil’s dad yell for him. The yelling caused Devrah to jump and she could feel a switch about to happen. Yelling was a trigger, especially male voices yelling. 

“Virgil’s room is just upstairs, first door on the right. He’ll be there as soon as he can”

They all walked up to Virgil’s room and made themselves at home. Devrah could feel Dayna trying to take control and put her face in her hands. She was trying to block everything out to let the switch happen. 

“Dex?” She heard Patton’s voice. 

She shook her head and closed her eyes. Her hands came up to cover her ears and she tried to keep her breathing even. Dayna took over and opened her eyes, seeing concerned and confused looks from her soulmates. 

“It’s Dayna, sorry”

“You never have to apologize for switching. Who did you switch from, if I’m allowed to ask that?”

“Devrah, woke up with her fronting and then a trigger was hit and now I’m fronting”

“A trigger was hit?”

She nodded and looked down at her hands. She started fidgeting with her hands, jumping when a fidget cube landed in her lap. She looked up and got a small smile from Virgil, she returned it. 

“So, I was wondering something, Dayna” Virgil said as he sat next to her on his bed. 

She nodded. 

“Can our parents know? Like it’s ok if not, just wanted to clear it by you”

She started fidgeting with the cube in her hands. She knew they would have to know eventually, but also many people didn’t believe that DID was a real thing. She would have to consult the whole system. 

“Um, if you give me a few minutes I could have an answer for you. I would need to consult the whole system”

They all nodded and she closed her eyes. She posed the question to everyone and got mixed answers. Dex was ok with it as was Dionysus and Dolphus. Devrah and Dunixi were not ok and she was on the fence. She sighed and put her face in her hands. She was going to say yes because as their soulmates their parents probably need to know. She lifted her head and opened her eyes. 

“Yes, they can know”

They all nodded and she fidgeted with the cube.

“Hey, Lo?”

He nodded. 

“Can they know about you?”

He looked down for a minute and then looked back up and nodded. They nodded and smiled at him. 

“Hey, Dayna?” Patton asked. 

She hummed in response. 

“Are we allowed to ask about triggers? Like I don’t want to be rude or intrude, but you did say one was hit and it caused a switch”

She nodded, looking down and fidgeting with the cube. 

“You’re allowed to ask, it just takes a lot to answer that because some triggers will give away the trauma”

They all nodded. 

“Then let’s simplify, can we know what trigger was hit?” Roman asked. 

“Um, male voices yelling”

They all nodded, Virgil grabbed her hand and squeezed. She squeezed back and gave him a smile. They were then called down for dinner. They sat down and had a plate sat in front of them. They thanked Virgil’s parents and started eating. 

“Hey mom, dad?”

They looked at Virgil. He looked to Dayna and Logan and got nods in return. He could tell them, it would be ok. 

“Um since these are my soulmates, there’s things you might need to know about them”

They gave him confused looks. He took a breath and let it out. 

“Dex has DID and Logan has autism”

They looked to Dayna and then to Logan. They nodded to confirm what Virgil had said. Dayna fidgeted with the cube, having brought it down with Virgil’s permission. 

“Ok, um are we allowed to ask questions?” his mom asked. 

They both nodded after looking at each other. Logan grabbed her hand and squeezed, she squeezed back. 

“What exactly is DID?”

Dayna took a breath and let it out. 

“It used to be called Multiple Personality Disorder”

Her mouth formed into a small ‘o’ and her eyes widened. She squeezed Logan’s hand and got a squeeze in return. Her other hand was fidgeting with the cube and she looked down. 

“That’s ok, just… I don’t know what I’m allowed to ask and what I’m not”

Dayna smiled looking back up. She then caught the look of disgust on Virgil’s father’s face. Oh no. 

“That’s not real. Wasn’t it proved to not be real like years ago? By like scientists and psychologists and all that?” He said. 

Her heart dropped and she could feel the anger bubbling up in her. She took a breath and pushed it down. Now was not the time to blow up. 

“It changed names. It went from Multiple Personality Disorder to Dissociative Identity Disorder. It is caused by childhood trauma”

He looked at her and she squeezed Logan’s hand again, getting a squeeze back. 

“What trauma? Nothing can be bad enough for you to think you’re crazy and have multiple personalities”

She could feel Dionysus fighting to come to the front. She tried to push him down, he would just make the situation worse. 

“Dad!” Virgil yelled. 

She was fighting the switch hard now. 

Virgil looked over and saw that she wasn’t ok. 

“Dayna I’m sorry. We just established that trigger”

She shook her head and looked down, taking her hand from Logan’s. She stood up, excusing herself and went to Virgil’s room, there was no way she was going to switch in front of his dad. She collapsed in the middle of the floor, going into the fetal position, her breathing picked up as she fought the tears. This is exactly what Devrah and Dunixi were afraid of, she should have listened. She was the one who was supposed to be able to handle hate. She heard footsteps and couldn’t make herself look up to see who it was. 

“Hey, it’s Virgil are you ok?”

She shook her head, the switch needed to happen but it wouldn’t for some reason. 

“Can I touch you?”

She nodded and he sat on the floor next to her. There was a hand on her back then, grounding her. 

“I-I…” she couldn’t get the words out. 

“Hey, it’s ok. Let me ask yes or no questions unless you know sign?”

She nodded, they did for when this situation happened. 

“Ok then sign it”

She signed to him. 

_I need to switch_

“Ok, is there anything I can do to help?”

She tried to slow her breathing, feeling him tap the rhythm out on her back. She heard more footsteps and then everyone was there, she felt their hands on her back too. She let the tears fall. 

“Hey, is there anything we can do to help?”

She nodded and held her hands out, hoping they would get the hint. Virgil took one and Patton took the other. She squeezed hard trying to get them to do the same. They did, squeezing her hands hard, grounding her more. She heard more footsteps and could feel the tension in Virgil, she knew it was his parents. She took her hand from Patton and signed. 

_I don’t want him to see this. He already thinks I’m crazy._

Patton took the hand then squeezed it again. She felt them cover her and let a smile grace her face even though she was still crying. She could feel the switch happening, she could hear words but couldn’t make out what they were saying. Dionysus took over and slowed his breathing. He took his hand from Virgil and wiped his face before looking up and giving them all a thankful smile. They nodded at him. He turned around to see Virgil’s mother in the doorway to his room.

“I’m-”

“Don’t apologize. Never apologize for that. I believe you and I’m sorry for what my husband said. He wanted to apologize which is why we came up here. I understand if you don’t want to see him right now though” 

He shook his head. 

“No, if he really wants to apologize and he means it I would like to hear it”

He saw her eyes widen at the different voice and mannerisms. It was a shock for some the first time they see it happen. She nodded before calling for Virgil’s dad. He came and stood next to her. He looked to Dionysus and he could see the regret in his eyes. So he would mean it. 

“I am terribly sorry for what I said. I shouldn’t have”

He nodded. 

“I forgive you”

He nodded before disappearing again. Virgil’s mom followed him. Dionysus turned to his soulmates and saw smiles on their faces. 

“I’m sorry about that” Virgil said. 

“You have nothing to apologize for. You didn’t know he would react like that”

Virgil nodded at him. They grabbed their stuff as it was getting late and they needed to get home. They hugged each other, just as Dionysus got to the door, he turned to them. 

“By the way, I’m Dionysus and I go by he/him”

They all smiled and nodded. They walked home and sent messages to the group chat letting the others know. His parents asked how his day was and he told them about what happened at Virgil’s. They made sure he was truly ok before letting him go to his room. He did his homework and then checked the group chat. He smiled and sent a few messages before putting his phone on the charger and going to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

Dex woke up, grabbing their phone and checking the messages in the group chat. They were deciding if they wanted to hang out today. They then decided to hang out at Roman’s house. Dex went down and told their parents where they were going and then walked to Roman’s. They knocked on the door and a minute later Roman opened it with a smile and led them to his room. They heard the door then and he went to answer it, leading the others into his room then. 

“So are we ready for graduation?” Logan asked. 

They all nodded and smiled. Dex was so ready, ready to be out of this town that they had grown up in. They had been in this town their whole life and they were ready to leave and never look back. They knew that their parents planned on moving while they were in college and they supported this decision. 

“Dex?” Virgil asked. 

Dex nodded and gave him a smile. They all got comfortable, Dex sat next to Roman on his bed, Patton and Virgil sat in the floor, and Logan sat at Roman’s desk. Dex could see the script for the upcoming play sitting on his desk and they smiled. 

“So, Dex, I told my parents about you and they were wondering if you could maybe explain it a bit better?” Roman asked. 

“Um, yea, I mean normally Dayna explains because she’s better at it but I can definitely try”

“Well they might ask at lunch when we go down there”

Dex nodded and started fidgeting with the sleeves of their hoodie. They hated being the one to explain it. They saw that Virgil had moved in front of them and had a fidget cube held out to them. 

“Keep this one, I have so many I won’t miss one”

They smiled at him and started fidgeting with the cube. They liked the ball, it was smooth and allowed them to move as little as possible but still be able to fidget if they needed. They sat and talked about what they would do in college. Virgil was going to go into music, Logan was going into aerospace engineering, Roman was going into acting, and Dex was going into psychology. Roman’s dad called them down for lunch and they went down and sat at the table. There was a plate placed in front of all of them and they thanked Roman’s dad. Roman’s other dad came and sat next to his husband.

“So, Dex?”

Dex looks up, fidgeting with the cube under the table. They nod. 

“Roman told us that you have, uh…”

“DID”

They nodded. 

“Would you be able to explain what exactly that is?”

They took a breath and let it out. They continued to fidget with the cube under the table as they explained. 

“It used to be called Multiple Personality Disorder. It changed names to Dissociative Identity Disorder. It is caused by childhood trauma”

They both nodded and gave him concerned looks. They looked at each other and then back at Dex. They really wished Dayna was fronting, she was the best at explaining this. Virgil grabbed their hand and squeezed, getting a squeeze in return. 

“So, you have multiple personalities?”

They nodded. 

“Ok, um, how many?”

They let a small smile fall on their face. 

“Six in total. I am the host.”

They both nodded and then went back to their lunch. Everyone finished their lunch and went back to Roman’s room. They decided to go Dex’s house then. Roman told his dads where they were going and they walked to Dex’s house. They went to their room and started talking about college again. Roman had a car, Logan and Virgil had cars and jobs. Dex had a car but they didn’t drive very often. 

They decided on getting an apartment close to campus and they could walk, drive, or carpool to classes. Dex smiled, they couldn't believe how lucky they had gotten with having friends and soulmates who were so accepting. They were talking about what they could afford and what they would want, when Dex's mom called them. They excused themself and went to their mom's room to see both of their parents sitting on the bed.

"Yea?"

"We were just wondering if there was anything we needed to know about your soulmates?"

Dex fidget with the cube in their hands. Was it their place to tell them? 

"Um, Logan has autism and Virgil has anxiety"

They nodded at them and then gave them a sad smile. They gave them a confused look.

"Mom? Dad? What's wrong?"

They looked at each other and then back at Dex. Their mom let out a sigh. 

"We're not sure we want you going so far away for college. We understand that you wanna be with your soulmates and that that college is one of the best, but we're uncomfortable with you being so far away"

They gave them a shocked look. They couldn't do this! The shock turned to anger and they clenched their fists. 

"This is because of the DID isn't it? I'm fucked up so I can't be at my dream college with my soulmates?"

"Honey, it's just we don't want you to need us and us not be able to get to you because you're so far away" their dad said.

They felt tears gather in their eyes. It felt like they were trying to punish them for something that wasn't their fault! They couldn't control what happened to them!

"Sweetheart, say something please?"

"I'm going to college and I'm gonna live with my soulmates. I'm not gonna stay in this town where the worst years of my life happened. I'm not gonna stay in the town that fucked me up. I'm getting out"

They sighed and nodded. They just had to make it to graduation and then they would be free. They could get the apartment with their soulmates and be happy. They sighed and wiped their face and eyes as they left their parents' room. They got back to their room and sat on the bed. 

“You ok?” Roman asked. 

They nodded, then shook their head and started crying again. They felt arms wrap around them and saw that it was Roman. Virgil joined the hug then. Patton and Logan followed. Once they were done crying they gave them all a smile. 

“Thanks”

“Of course! Do you wanna talk about it?” Patton asked. 

“My parents don’t want me to go off to college. They want me to stay here”

They all gave them a shocked look. 

“Are you gonna go?” Virgil asked. 

They nodded. 

“The worst years of my life were spent in this town. I’ve been in this town for 18 years. I’m ready to get out”

They all nodded and then went back to the spots they had been in. They talked about school and dreams, plans for the future. Dex looked at their phone and saw how late it was getting. 

“Do you all wanna just stay the night?”

They all nodded and texted their parents. Dex looked at Logan and saw him fidgeting with a pencil that was on their desk. They also saw that his other hand was in his pocket. He looked tired, but put on a smile and tried not to show it. 

“Logan?”

Logan looked at them. 

“Are you ok?”

He nodded, looking down. A second later he shook his head. 

“What’s wrong?”

He sighed and opened his mouth to say something, then closed it again. He tried again and seemed to be frustrated that he couldn’t get the words to come out. He sighed and shook his head. 

“Logan?” Virgil said. 

He looked at Virgil. 

“Do you know sign?”

He nodded and raised his hands and started signing. 

_Just got a little overwhelmed. Sorry to worry you._

“Is there anything we can do to help?”

He sat for a minute and seemed to be thinking. They waited and then he raised his hands again. 

_Not really, just let this pass. I can become nonverbal when overwhelmed which is what happened here._

Virgil and Dex nodded before passing the message on to Patton and Roman. They nodded as well and then they continued to talk about anything and everything. Dex noticed that Logan had pulled his hand out of his pocket. He would flap it for a few seconds before stopping and placing his hand on his leg. He did this a few times. 

“Logan?” Patton said. 

Logan looked at Patton. 

“Are you ok?”

He nodded and flapped his hand again before stopping and placing it down. 

“Can we ask questions?” Roman asked. 

Logan nodded. 

“Why are you flapping your hand?”

Logan blushed and looked down. 

“It’s pure curiosity and desire to be able to help, Logan. No teasing or mocking"

Logan nodded and took a breath before letting it out. 

“It’s a stim. Stimming helps me not get so overwhelmed. I try not to stim that often because I know it looks weird and people don’t react well to it in public. Sorry about that”

“Logan” Dex said. 

Logan looked at them. 

“Never apologize for stimming, or for getting overwhelmed, or anything like that”

He nodded and gave them a smile. Dex laid down on their bed, Roman laying with them. Virgil crawled over the two of them and laid on Dex’s other side. Patton and Logan also squeezed onto Dex’s bed and got comfortable. Dex closed their eyes and fell asleep with a smile.


	5. Chapter 5

Dex woke up with arms wrapped around them. They opened their eyes to see Roman in front of them, Virgil behind them with his arms around him, Logan on the other side of Roman, and Patton behind Virgil. They smiled as they looked around at their soulmates. They looked to the doorway when they heard a knock. Their mom was standing in the doorway with a small smile on her face. 

“Breakfast is ready whenever you all get up”

Dex nodded and watched as she walked away. They felt Roman move and looked back at him. He opened his eyes and smiled at them. Dex was overcome with an urge to kiss him. They leaned forward and kissed him, giving him a chance to pull back. He returned the kiss and they pulled away and smiled at each other. Dex noticed the others were awake and looking at them. 

“That was so cute”

Dex hid their face in their hands, feeling the heat on their cheeks. They heard small chuckles all around them and couldn’t help but smile. When they looked up again they were greeted with smiling faces. 

“My mom said breakfast is ready. Do we wanna head down?”

They all nodded and so they got up and went downstairs. When they got there, Dex saw their mom and dad sitting at the table with half empty plates. There were plates set out for all of them and they all sat down. They ate in silence for a few minutes, until Dex noticed that their parents kept glancing at them before quickly looking away. They sighed and set their fork down. 

“Mom? Dad?”

They both looked at them and gave them a concerned look. 

“We received some news”

Dex’s heart started pounding. That was never a way that people worded good news so that meant it was bad news. 

“What news?” They asked as they reached for the hands closest to them. 

Roman sat on their right and Virgil on their left. They squeezed their hands and got squeezes back in return. Virgil started tapping their wrist and they recognized the breathing exercise. They started matching their breathing to the rhythm as they waited for their parents to reply. They looked at each other and Dex could tell they were having a silent conversation. 

“Maybe this would be better in private” their mom said. 

Dex shook their head. 

“No, it’s ok”

“Honey, are you sure? How much do they know?”

Dex’s heart dropped at that. That meant it had something to do with them and one of the many things that was wrong with them. 

“Not much, but they’ll learn eventually so it’s ok”

“Are you sure?” their dad asked. 

Dex looked around at their soulmates. Their faces were a mixture of concerned and worried. They were going to find out eventually, so better sooner than later right? Dex shook the thought out of their head. They squeezed the hands they were holding and got squeezes back. They took a deep breath and then looked at their parents and gave them a nod. Their parents looked at each other and then their mom sighed. 

“Someone bailed him out of jail”

Dex’s heart dropped even further. He was free? Why did he even have a bail? After what he did and for how long it went on. There was so much evidence against him. How did anyone have that bail money? It had to have been thousands right? Their breathing picked up and the hands they were holding let go. They gave them space but they also heard Virgil trying to talk them through the breathing exercise. It wasn’t working, they couldn’t breathe!

“Dex” Roman’s voice broke through. 

They focused on him and reached out for him. He grabbed their hands and squeezed firmly. He started tapping the rhythm but it still wasn’t working. They couldn’t breathe. They heard Roman talking and knew it wasn’t to them. He nodded at Virgil and then looked at Dex again. 

“Dex, can you hear me?”

They nodded. 

“I need you to tell me, or point to, five things you can see”

They looked around and started pointing. They pointed to the table, to Roman, to the chair, to the floor, and to the plate that was in front of them. 

“That’s great. Now four things you can feel”

They squeezed Roman’s hand and saw him nod. They pulled a hand out of his grip and reached for Virgil. Virgil offered his arm and they grabbed the sleeve of his jacket. They then let go and grabbed the fork in front of them. Then they gripped the table. 

“Good, three things you can hear”

Their breathing had slowed to the point that they thought they could manage words now. They closed their eyes and focused. 

“The ac, your breathing, Patton’s breathing”

“Awesome, um” 

Dex opened their eyes and saw Roman looking to Virgil. 

“Two things you can smell” Virgil said. 

“The eggs, and the orange juice”

Their breathing was back to normal. They noticed the ache in their chest then and made a face. They looked to Virgil. 

“One thing you can taste”

“Eggs”

Virgil smiled at them and reached out a hand. Dex took it and held it tightly. Virgil squeezed their hand and they smiled at him. They went still as they felt their control of the body slip. They were watching what was happening, but they didn’t have control. They called out to Dayna, trying to figure out who was with them. 

“Dex?” Logan said. 

Dex tried to answer, but couldn’t. Who was this? Dayna got back to them, no one knew who was co-conscious with them. 

“Not entirely”

Dex watched as everyone looked at each other and then back to the body. 

“Who else are we speaking to?” Logan asked. 

“My name is Janus”

Dex called out to Dayna again. Who was Janus? They didn’t know about them. Dayna didn’t know about them either. She went to consult the rest of the system. Dex listened to the conversation again while they waited on Dayna. 

“What are your pronouns?” 

“He/him”

Dayna then got back to Dex, no one in the system had known about Janus either. Well that would be something to talk to the system about later. 

“You said ‘not entirely’. Does that mean that Dex is still here?”

“They are co-conscious with me. They can only see and hear what’s going on though, they do not have control of the body anymore”

Dex watched as everyone looked at each other before looking back at the body. They saw their parents’ confused expressions. 

“Janus?” Their dad said. 

“Yes?”

“Why have we never heard of you before. I thought that we knew all of the alters?”

“The system was not even aware of me until now. I imagine there will be a conversation later, but for now I am here with Dex”

Their dad nodded, but looked concerned now. Dex watched as everyone finished breakfast in a tense silence. Then Logan suggested they head back up to Dex’s room and they did. Dex watched Janus settle on the bed with Roman next to them. Logan sat at the desk, Patton and Virgil sat on the floor. 

“So, Janus?” Logan said. 

Janus looked at him. 

“Why did you make yourself known now?”

“I am protecting the rest of the system. I heard the news and took over as much as I could because I do not want anyone else in the system to deal with it right now. They shouldn’t have to”

Dex watched as they all looked at each other before looking back at them. They seemed confused and worried and Dex didn’t blame them. Dex was getting tired from being co-conscious with Janus. They could deal with Janus and all of this with the rest of the system later. Dex gave Janus full control.


End file.
